Nothing Else Matters
by Discordia the Goddess of Irony
Summary: Set directly after "Freak Nation" this is the story of Max after she settles into her new life in Terminal City.


A/N and disclaimer: I don't own the rights to _Dark Angel_, much to my chagrin. I decided to write this after I started reading some of the other fanfictions in the category, which in turn inspired me to take new interest in the series. So much so that I even purchased the Del Rey prequel novel. This picks up right where the series left off, after the episode "Freak Nation." I'm not quite sure where I'm going with all of this, but I will at least cover the relationship. And by that I mean Max and Logan's screwed up love life. The first chapter is a little short for my taste, but it seemed like a good stopping point. Thanks always to my wonderful beta reader Sagan Fox. Don't know what I'd do without you. The title of this story is from a Metallica song of their self named album. I do not own the rights to that either. Please read and review.

Max watched as Joshua raised the flag over Terminal City, smiling softly as she held Logan's hand. The government could backpedal all they wanted, but they couldn't deny the presence of transgenics, not anymore. Of course, they could always send in the National Guard to quickly remedy that little blot on the nation's virtue, but it didn't seem probable. Max turned to smile at Logan, forgetting for a moment that she'd lied to him and said she was with Alec. As the other X5 in question stepped out onto the roof to watch the proceedings, Logan released his grip on Max's hand, clearing his throat and allowing the traces of a smile that had graced his face to fade. With a pointed look at Max, he walked away. Max turned to glare at her fellow transgenic. 

_'Just ruin my moment why don't you?' _she thought bitterly to herself. With a huff, Max walked over to Joshua, smiling for his sake as he turned to her.

"Little fella like it?" he questioned her eagerly.

Max grinned even wider as she saw pride in his eyes. Placing a hand on his shoulder, she gave him an encouraging nod. "It's great Joshua. It'll give everybody out there something to think about when they see Terminal City on the news. Now they know; we're here to stay."

Alec glanced up at the flag, a somewhat nonplused expression on his face. As he shoved his hands into his pockets, he directed a comment at Max. "Or it lets them know which building to aim at when they start attacking." 

Max turned angrily to Alec. It was bad enough she had to keep Logan at a distance, but to have to deal with Alec as well was just too much. "I don't recall asking for your opinion," she snapped, keeping one arm on Joshua's shoulder. "I don't even remember asking you to stay."

"Funny," Alec quipped, "because I don't recall asking you to put me in the middle of your relationship with the wonderful Eyes Only. Next time, ask before you use me as an excuse not to be with someone." Alec turned and stormed away at that, following the same path as Logan.

As the door shut behind him, Max let out a frustrated sigh, and Joshua gave her a consoling pat on the back. "Thanks big fella,' she whispered, "it's nice to know that not everyone here hates me." With one of her many faked and bittersweet smiles, Max turned to Joshua. "I'll be fine. I just need some time to myself, ok?"

Joshua nodded and watched as Max wandered away to deal with her personal problems. Normally, if Max had needed time to herself, she would have climbed to the top of the Space Needle and done her thinking there. Her current situation, however, precluded that as a viable option. To make up for that fact, Max found herself one of the more secluded buildings and perched up on the roof, surveying the protesters and news crews outside the walls of Terminal City. Away from everyone else, she could berate herself properly for how she was dealing with her situation. _'Logan probably hates me, and he's entitled to after all that I've done to him. I should've just told him the truth, bu no, I had to go and make things worse than they already are.' _Max sighed, wishing that things were somehow different than they were. Maybe if she had helped Logan from the beginning, without waiting for him to get shot, things would've been better. Then again, Logan's ability to walk had never been the largest obstacle to their relationship, just one of many unfortunate coincidences in the large string of mishaps that plagued them. Closing her eyes, Max let herself imagine a world where she wasn't constantly forced to deal with being a transgenic and all the baggage that entailed. After only a few moments, though, Max realized that her imagination wasn't that strong. Life just wasn't the same if she wasn't a hunted, genetically enhanced person with the social and romantic life from hell. With another sigh, Max headed back toward the main buildings on Terminal City. Her personal crises could wait; there were people who needed her.

Max spent the remainder of her day trying to help find places for the increasing number of transgenics arriving at Terminal City. No matter what she did, there was always something else that required her time and attention. If it wasn't finding a place for them to sleep, it was finding food for them or medical supplies to treat them. She finally reverted to her military background and began organizing the efforts to keep Terminal City going. She assigned the X series to search for food, while others searched for medical supplies. After a day of work, both the food and medical supplies were dangerously inadequate. With what they had, Max determined that the group could survive for little more than a week, without adding any more to the ranks and barring any medical emergencies. With everything settled for the night, Max was finally free to grab something to eat and get her few hours of sleep. Unfortunately, Max's trials for the day had yet to end, and she found herself face to face with Logan in one of the halls.

"Logan, I . . . uh . . . " Max quickly found her vocabulary slipping from her as she stared into the pained depths of his eyes. "Look, I wanted to talk to you about . . ."

"Don't," Logan interrupted, "you don't have to explain. You're with Alec now. So let's just try to make things easier on both of us."

He turned to leave, but Max stopped him, catching hold of the tail of his shirt. "But I'm not with Alec," she insisted, finally telling him the bitter truth. "I just said that so you wouldn't try to get close to me. I didn't want to hurt you." Max let go of his shirt, dropping her hand as she realized that she wasn't wearing gloves. Tears welled up in her eyes, but she fought them, struggling to find words. "I didn't want to hurt you," she repeated weakly.

Logan turned to her, his eyes serious and calculating. "You lied to me?" he asked, ignoring the trembling of her shoulders as she battled to keep control of herself.

Max nodded, biting her lip and squeezing her eyes shut. "I just . . . I couldn't . . . I almost killed you a second time. I couldn't do that again." Max held her breath, waiting for an accusation, something that would indicate that Logan was angry at her, but it never came. When she finally opened her now tear filled eyes, Logan was still standing there. His face looked almost expressionless as he listened, but Max had to finish her little catharsis. "I know you probably hate me right now," she whispered so he could hear her, "but I want you to know that I love you. Please, just think about forgiving me."

Max didn't even wait for a response before turning and blindly running down the hall. And so she didn't see Logan's lips twist upward in a bitter smile or hear him as he whispered, "I forgive you."


End file.
